Susan
March 27, 2024
From the moment the inaugural season of The Golden Bachelor aired in September of 2023, viewers were hooked. In fact, 6.1 million people watched the December finale, making it the most popular episode of any Bachelor franchise show in three years. Watching Gerry’s journey did something amazing for the show’s audience: it gave them hope of finding love after the age of 50. Countless clients have come to me asking about how to find a golden bachelor — or how to find a golden bachelorette. The good news? While it may not seem like it, there are still plenty of eligible bachelors and
bachelorettes out there in the golden years. You just need to know the right places to look — and that’s where I come in.
The Golden Bachelor drastically reduced the stigma and negative stereotypes relating to senior dating. A recent DateMyAge survey found that 70% of singles aged 50+ are now interested in meeting someone, and more than half are online dating with the specific intention of finding a long-term partner. And why not? I fully believe that everyone deserves love at any age — including you.
So, if you’re looking for your very own golden bachelor or bachelorette, read on for my pro tips.
1. Lean into your passions.
The best way to find someone who has a similar lifestyle and values is to actively pursue your hobbies and interests in a social context. So, rather than read books at home, join a book club. Rather than do laps in your backyard pool, join a local fitness club. Rather than just watching YouTube cooking videos in your kitchen, sign up for a local cooking class. These kinds of activities allow you to meet like-minded people you’re more likely to be compatible with. Plus, you can rest assured that the kinds of people you’ll meet through clubs, organizations, and classes are still eager to take advantage of all life has to offer, regardless of their age.
Not sure where to start? Try searching EventBrite or Facebook Events to find meet-ups specifically geared toward seniors.
Meetup also offers an easy way to find singles-friendly opportunities, too — and the best part is that you can search by category or keywords to find groups and events that appeal to you. Or, look for conferences with themes targeted toward an older crowd — like the AARP Life +50 events.
2. Tell your friends you’re looking.
One of the best (and not to mention the safest) ways to meet a partner is through mutual friends. Not only do you get peace of mind that the person is trustworthy, but there’s also a certain level of comfort and familiarity already established. So, let all your friends in the 50+ age range that you’re actively looking for love. Better yet, be specific about the type of mate you’re seeking. You never know — your cousin, colleague, or friend of a friend may know someone who’s perfect for you. But unless they’re aware of your current dating goals, they won’t ever think to set you up or connect you with that person.
3. Work on yourself.
Here’s a harsh truth: No golden bachelor or golden bachelorette worth dating is going to be interested in someone who lacks confidence, who’s carrying around a lot of baggage from their past, or who doesn’t take care of themselves physically. So, before you begin your quest to find a potential partner, take a good look at yourself. Are you prioritizing your health and well-being? Do you have a positive outlook on life? Have you healed from any past traumas? Do you have solid self-esteem, and know your worth?
You can only attract high-value people if you yourself have value to bring to the relationship. Seeking professional guidance from a therapist, life coach, or matchmaker can help you to identify what areas you need to work on, and ultimately, encourage you to grow into your best self.
4. Consider your location.
Whether you know it or not, where you live can have a massive impact on your dating success in the golden years. A 2023 survey by Seniorly found that the best states for single seniors are:
- Idaho
- Minnesota
- Wisconsin
- Vermont
- Utah
- Washington
- Oregon
- Michigan
- New Hampshire
- Iowa
- Wyoming
- Colorado
On the other end of the spectrum, Kentucky, Tennessee, Alabama, South Carolina, Louisiana, the District of Columbia, and Mississippi ranked as the worst states for older adults looking to find love.
5. Switch up your social routine.
One of the reasons why many singles struggle to find potential mates is that they’re stuck in social ruts. They go to the same restaurants, the same gym, and the same coffee shop day after day. Shaking up your routine can expose you to new people you’d never otherwise meet. For example, if you and your girlfriends always go to that local bistro on Friday night, try checking out a luxury hotel bar — where you might be more likely to find successful businessmen. Or, if you usually take your morning run in your own neighborhood, consider heading to a nearby park instead.
Something to keep in mind: One smart strategy is to think about what activities the opposite sex is doing. Women over the age of 50 are more likely to pursue gardening, dancing classes, arts and crafts, and educational classes (like learning a new language). Men over the age of 50 are more likely to be involved in athletic activities (like tennis or golf), or spending time in nature (like hiking and fishing).
6. Take up pickleball.
Gerry isn’t the only golden bachelor who loves playing pickleball. In case you haven’t noticed, ever since the COVID-10 pandemic started, this sport has seen a huge surge in popularity — and with good reason. It burns lots of calories, it’s much easier on the joints than many other types of physical activity, it keeps your brain sharp, it improves your balance to help prevent falls (which are more common as you age), and it’s super fun. Moreover, since it’s a social sport that’s played with two or four participants, it offers a stellar way to meet other people who are physically fit and who prioritize their health.
You can use this link to find pickleball clubs across the U.S. (and Canada).
7. Go on a cruise.
If you’re really struggling to meet people in your day to day life, consider booking a cruise. More specifically, look into a singles cruise for seniors. These cruises offer a fabulous opportunity to get to know golden-year singles in a no-pressure environment.
Since a cruise typically lasts at least a couple of weeks, and there are so many group activities, it’s basically one giant mixer. You won’t have to worry about whether or not anyone there is already taken — and you’ll have so many fun chances to bond and assess your compatibility, from cooking classes to dance parties. If you traveling is important to you, a cruise is also a great way to meet people who are equally passionate about seeing the world.
8. Volunteer in your local community.
Sure, a great smile, a good sense of humor, or a killer body are definitely among some of the most attractive traits. But did you know that giving back to your local community can also give you a leg up in the dating world as well?
In one 2013 study, both men and women were more likely to rate altruistic people — such as those who volunteer at a local homeless shelter — as more attractive, especially for long-term relationships.
Volunteering is a fantastic way to meet a golden bachelor or bachelorette. But in order to find someone with similar passions, be intentional about the kind of volunteering you get involved in. Love animals? Consider helping out at your local shelter. Care about the environment? Sign up to help clean beaches or help grow a community garden.
VolunteerMatch.org offers an easy way to search for opportunities to give back, and you can filter your results based on your location and interests.
9. Get help from a professional matchmaker.
I won’t sugarcoat things: Meeting eligible golden bachelors and bachelorettes isn’t easy. If you’re really serious about your search, working with a professional matchmaker is one guaranteed way to upgrade your love life.
But keep in mind that not all matchmakers are created equal. I pride myself on maintaining a large but elite nationwide network of singles, and I’ve helped countless people in the 50+ age range meet “The One.” Not only can I provide image coaching to increase the odds that you attract a compatible partner, but my team members and I can also match you with singles who meet your needs, desires, and standards — and share your goals, values, and interest.