Susan
July 1, 2025
By Megan Dematteo
Dating is fun at every age, but it has serious benefits for mature adults. Research tells us healthy romantic relationships among seniors can improve cognitive function, boost physical vitality, and lead to a happier, more satisfying life. Some experts take it further and suggest these perks can even reduce stress hormones, boost lifespan, and make healing after surgeries less painful.
However, as anyone who’s survived heartbreak will understand, prioritizing compatibility in a partner is important if you want to soak up all of the advantages of dating as a senior. Otherwise, you end up on the romance hamster wheel, spending your limited time and energy on people who aren’t right for you.
Selectivity can be especially challenging for senior men, many of whom are dating for the first time without the pressures of marriage, children, or other expectations they may have felt in their 20s, 30s, or 40s. This sense of freedom—combined with the fact that single senior women far outnumber their male counterparts—means single senior men can fall into some serious pitfalls that keep them stuck with mismatched partners.
If you’re a widower, widow, divorcee, or simply a single man, it’s worth putting your best and most authentic self forward. To help men in their golden years find satisfying companionship later in life, elite dating service Exclusive Matchmaking put together a list of advice for senior men ready for romance.
“Love doesn’t have an expiration date,” said Susan Trombetti, the expert matchmaker behind the company, which works with clients across the U.S. “Dating in your mature years and finding love after 70 and beyond can lead to fulfilling and intentional relationships.”
If you want a fulfilling love life, avoid these senior dating pitfalls to make yourself available for a truly compatible companion.
Avoid ‘catfishing’ with outdated or misleading photos
The biggest “ick,” according to Floyd, a San Diego-area woman who found love eight years ago at the age of 75, is catfishing, or displaying photos of yourself that don’t reflect the reality of who you are. She used two websites—eHarmony and Zoosk.com—to meet men, often with mixed results.
“Maybe a quarter of the people I went out with put up false pictures [on their dating profiles],” she said. “Or they said they were fit when they weren’t, and then I’d get there and think, ‘who is this man?’”
Be forthcoming about your age, lifestyle preferences, and mobility. While many are shy to admit their real age upfront, it’s always best to be honest, lest you find yourself embarrassed and alone when the truth inevitably comes out.
“Start by getting over the idea that your age will hold you back,” said Trombetti. “Anyone can date at any age, it’s all about getting yourself out there and being vulnerable.”
One benefit of using a matchmaking service instead of a dating app or website is that someone can help you create a profile that presents the best of your personality and appearance without bold-face lying.
Don’t treat your dating profile like a résumé
Attracting the right woman is less about flaunting all of your accomplishments, and more about showing your warmth and personality.This is your opportunity to shine. Remember, you’re not applying for a job, but rather attracting someone to spend time with the real you.
Floyd recalls seeing her now-boyfriend’s profile after scrolling through dozens of bad fits. “His profile was fabulous,” she said. “It showed a great sense of humor … And his picture was very nice—he had on slacks and a white shirt and a navy blue blazer slid over his shoulder… I thought, ‘this guy’s nice.’”
She also looked for “green flags,” or signals that they shared similar values and lifestyle preferences. “He had a background of everything that appealed to me—he’d been in the military, he was a financial advisor, he was of the same background and financial status that I would be accustomed to being with. I could tell that from his profile.”
To Floyd, these signals symbolized overall compatibility. “He loved everything I wanted to do—loved to hike, loved to get out in the wilderness. It just seemed like he had it together.”
But most importantly, his well-curated profile brought her comfort when she instantly recognized him in public on their first date. There was no confusion or guessing games, both of which cause stress—a known intimacy killer.
“He was standing there in the same outfit that was on the website, so I couldn’t mistake him—it was him. He was tall, slender, fit. He looked fabulous.”
Prioritize online safety and protect yourself from scams
It’s easy to be apprehensive when dating as a senior, and rightfully so. The FBI received over 100,000 complaints in 2023 from Americans over 60 years old who were the victims of a scam. The losses of those victims exceeded $3.4 billion. Elder fraud increased by 14% in 2023—with financial losses swelling another 11%— and Trombetti expects it will continue to rise as scammers become more tech-savvy.
Moreover, senior males are more vulnerable to sweetheart scams, says Trombetti, where a potential match uses deceptive tactics to gain trust and access someone’s money. “Stay alert and focused when meeting someone new,” she advised, whether that’s a friend or romantic interest.
To protect your money, emotions and well-being, Trombetti says you should take your time and ask your romantic interest deep questions during the courtship phase to assess their character below the surface. As always, practice safe sex, and keep your finances private until your partner demonstrates consistent trustworthiness.
Safety is another reason why many senior men work with a matchmaking service to weed out any suspicious opportunists. Working with a professional matchmaker can make your senior dating experience much easier because they won’t set you up with scammers, they’ll make sure your match is someone who aligns with your values, and they’ll help prepare you for your first date.
Embrace (and enjoy!) the phone call phase
One way to address safety while easing your way into a new relationship is to schedule a phone call before the first in-person date. It can also be an opportunity for romance to build naturally.
”We had talked on the phone once or twice before I went out with him, and he had this sexy voice,” recalls Floyd about her now-boyfriend. “I said, ‘You should have a radio station.’ He says, ‘Well, funny that you say that—I used to be on the radio!’”
The first phone call matters. It sets the tone and builds anticipation, and it’s much more intimate than texting, where deciphering the other person’s tone is often impossible. It can also be a fun way to start flirting and see if sparks fly.
Talking on Face Time or Zoom is also an easy way to screen for catfishing—does the person’s voice, face, and personality match their profile?—while warming up to a new romantic prospect.
Don’t wait for her to make the first move
One of the most impressive ways Floyd’s now-boyfriend stood among the other men was that he took initiative.
Not only did he message her first through the dating platform, but once they’d spent an hour getting to know one another over cocktails on their first date, he surprised her by arranging a romantic oceanview table with the hostess.
“Oh man, he took the initiative on everything,” said Floyd. “We chatted and laughed. Then he said, ‘By the way, do you have time for dinner?’ And I said, ‘Well, actually, I think so.’ So he said, ‘Well, I asked the hostess for a romantic table by the window.”
After dinner, Floyd’s date walked her to the car and ended the night with a “little peck on the cheek.” As she recalls, she remembers feeling like the universe sent her the man of her dreams. “And we’ve been together ever since.”
So don’t underestimate the power of making small, thoughtful gestures.
If you’re not the type to make the first move, a matchmaker can help you find love by getting to know you and your wants and desires, screening and vetting people to make sure they suit your lifestyle, and having people in their Rolodex who they can match you with in your city or state.
That said, you’ll still have to show up to the date with an open heart.
Stop worrying you’ll lose touch with who you are
“Seniors can often feel like they have their routine already, and someone new might shake things up,” writes Trombetti about her matchmaking clients. That can be daunting, especially to men who value their independence.
“However, you can still keep your independence when you have a partner,” Trombetti said.
Her advice is to think of your potential date as someone who won’t take away who you are, but rather make you shine brighter and complement your individuality.
Stay persistent—and don’t give up up after a few bad dates
When it comes to finding love, age has no number. Neither should you limit yourself to a handful of disappointing dates.
Approximately 36% of adults 65 and older say they are single, according to the Pew Research Center, and at least 25% of them are looking for dates. Trombetti advises senior men in particular to be careful not to let frustration eliminate them from the dating pool and miss out on possible connections with a whole third of their peer group.
Now more than ever, people are living longer, more satisfying lives. As science expands and improves, people are staying healthier. Sure, you may be retired from your career or vocation—but why should you retire from dating?